On page 121 of Chapter 9, the Communication Privacy Management Theory is described. According to Sandra Petronio, a communication theorist, “all people have personal boundary rules to guide whether or not they will disclose private information to someone else”. It is very interesting how different people form their own privacy rules. There are five criteria from which people form their privacy rules. The criteria are culture, gender, motives, context, and risk-benefit ratio.
Different cultures are more open when it comes to emotions than others. With gender, it’s pretty obvious that (most) women are more open than (most) men. Try and get a man to share his feelings with you, it’s like pulling teeth. My fiancé likes responding with one word answers. Maybe it’s just to get me to leave him alone, I don’t know. “Interpersonal motives of attraction and liking” tend to get people to disclose more with one another. Context is also important because it can change the tone of a conversation. Lastly, the risk-benefit ratio often determines whether or not we will disclose information to someone. If I feel like someone will judge me unfairly or unjustly, I may not disclose information to them because of it’s a high risk. On the other hand, if there is some benefit to me, I will disclose. If I know the person has some good advice or will just listen to my situation and offer a shoulder to cry on, then that’s a benefit!
integrating theory--dialogue
15 years ago
4 comments:
I agree with that certain people make you feel comfortable sharing personal things with them. Usually for me I will open up more with people when I trust them and when I feel that they are not judging me for what I am telling them. Sometimes when I open up to my boyfriend and tell him things about my past I feel that he is judging me, it has really created a wedge in our relationship to say the least. Some people I open up too because I feel they have some kind of wisdom and can help me through a certain situation or problem I am having. Overall I really enjoyed your discussion it had a lot of good insight that helped me understand the Social Penetration theory better.
Its interesting how all the theories in our book are simple to apply to our everyday lives. I completely agree with your post here about the risk-benefit situation. Its always important to weigh the risks with the benefits when deciding whether or not to disclose personal or important information. One of the worst feelings in the world is when you weigh the risks and benefits incorrectly and end up disclosing information to the wrong person or at the wrong time.
I can relate to what you posted because I am a lot like your fiance. I am a women but I always answer short and don't like to talk about my feelings a lot. I would rather just listen and be quiet and think to myself than talk. A lot of people don't understand why I don't talk a lot. I have come that I am just the kind of person who would rather listen and only talk about something "important" if I have to. I used to never open up to people because of trust issues because I would be afraid that they would judge me and who I was in my past... I definitely can relate to what you are saying!
Gender, motives, context, and risk-benefit are all based in culture. So women aren't inherently more likely to self-disclose than men. Rather, girls learn from an early age that it's okay to express their feelings (at least some; generally not okay for women to express anger) and boys learn it's not okay ("big boys don't cry"). So children quickly learn the rules of self-disclosure--what, how much, to whom, and in what context. Still, there's variation, as saucysaschy mentions, which may stem from the individual's personality traits or family background.
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